How are you?
Yesterday I encouraged you to ask the second question, but I didn’t fully explain what that means.
Being present involves listening and listening involves hearing what is said. However, real listening also includes hearing what is not said. When we are present, we can listen, and when we listen, we can hear both what is said and what is left unsaid.
How are you? Fine.
That word says so much when we are really listening, and many times there is more to the story.
No, really, how are you?
When we ask the second question, we are leaning into what was unsaid and creating the opportunity and space for it to surface. The uncovering of something is the first step to taking action. Asking the second question is also a powerful affirmation as it communicates to the other person that you value them enough to really listen and care enough to want to know the full truth.
The second question exemplifies wu wei because it leads to uncovering, which leads to discovery, and discovery is a catalyst for change.
Do good and be well,
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