Frederick Buskey
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"_____ under pressure."

11/30/2023

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Colleagues,

Lesson 4 from Thanksgiving with a fractured family: Again, we choose.
 
We choose to give grace, or to hold tightly onto our pain.
 
It’s easier to give grace when we understand it is not about us.
 
When I give grace, I choose to move forward. I choose to flow like water around the injury.
 
And remember, grace is not earned, it is given.
 
In fact, grace is most powerful when it is given freely and without conditions.
 
Like way too many families in the United States, mine has been fractured by politics and disagreement. At the same time, we have been reminded by loss and grief how important family is. As members of my extended family sought to find common ground or at least to move forward in a constructive way, I was reminded of five important lessons this week. I hope these lessons find meaning in both your personal and professional lives.
 
Today’s intention: Here’s the secret – giving grace to others does more good for you than for the person who receives it. 😉

Cheers!

Frederick
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Does the world revolve around you?

11/29/2023

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Colleagues,

Lesson 3 from Thanksgiving with a fractured family: We choose to make it about us or to see a bigger picture.
 
One of the first lessons I teach beginning teachers is that student behavior is rarely about the teacher.
 
How we behave says more about us than the people we are with.
 
We live in a world where companies have gotten very good at capturing and holding our attention by pushing us to experience anger.
 
We live in a world where political “leaders” have gotten very good at influencing our actions by pushing us to experience anger. With an unwholesome dose of fear added.
 
Inevitably, the anger and fear people are experiencing is turned on others, on you. But that anger and fear is not about you!
 
This matters, because when you accept it isn’t about you, the pain and resentment lessen.
 
Letting go of those negatives allows us to be better at carrying out the previous lessons.
 
When we know it isn’t about us, it is easier to choose to show up as our best selves. It is easier to be like water. 
 
Like way too many families in the United States, mine has been fractured by politics and disagreement. At the same time, we have been reminded by loss and grief how important family is. As members of my extended family sought to find common ground or at least to move forward in a constructive way, I was reminded of five important lessons this week. I hope these lessons find meaning in both your personal and professional lives.
 

Today’s intention: Think about situations or relationships where anger and fear are present. Can you work to let it go of the negatives, even just a little bit?

Cheers!

Frederick
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Of stone and water

11/28/2023

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​Colleagues,

Lesson 2 from Thanksgiving with a fractured family: We choose to be like stone or water.
 
Stones are impermeable. They are great for creating foundations, but if you are building a wall between you and your family, that is not a great thing.
 
Water flows. It is resistant to being blocked. It does not fight or argue, or contend. It simply ignores and goes around.
 
Many people, at home and at work, will put up barriers. Beating on barriers is seldom effective. 
 
Bypassing them works much better.
How?
 
Just show up as your best self. Don’t resist, attack, or build walls of your own. Ignore the barriers and act as if they don’t exist. Care without making your caring conditional on the response.
 
Like way too many families in the United States, mine has been fractured by politics and disagreement. At the same time, we have been reminded by loss and grief how important family is. As members of my extended family sought to find common ground or at least to move forward in a constructive way, I was reminded of five important lessons this week. I hope these lessons find meaning in both your personal and professional lives.
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​Today’s intention: Just watch people. Look for evidence of stones, and of water. Reflect on what you see.
 
Photo by Shojol Islam: https://www.pexels.com/photo/rock-in-a-sea-19038953/

Cheers!

Frederick
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Feasting on emotions

11/27/2023

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Colleagues,
 
Like way too many families in the United States, mine has been fractured by politics and disagreement. At the same time, loss and grief have reminded us how important family is. As members of my extended family sought to find common ground or at least to move forward in a constructive way, I was reminded of five important lessons this week. I hope these lessons find meaning in both your personal and professional lives.
 
Lesson 1: We choose how we show up.
 
Every day, every interaction, we choose what we bring to the table. We can choose to bring our anger, our hurt, our frustration. Or we can bring our grace, our empathy, and our love.
 
The really cool thing is that how I choose to show up is not controlled by the other person. Another’s anger, hurt, and frustration does not prevent me from being graceful, empathetic, and loving.
 
Today’s intention: Be mindful of how you show up for others. Be mindful of the people who make it hard for you to show up as your best self. And then remember, they do not control you.

Cheers!

Frederick
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Do you know the secret power of alignment?

11/24/2023

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​Colleagues,
 
MVP: Sorry, you’ll need to read the whole message today 😉
 
If you are appreciating this week’s focus on alignment, remember you can get a deeper dive by listening to Tuesday’s podcast here.

​Everything I’ve shared this week related to the Six Dimensions of Organizations, the framework I use for helping leaders understand how to lead organizations.
 
Note that the interior of the pyramid is labeled “internal forces.” Internal forces are the result of the degree of alignment between people, purpose, structures, and resources.
 
The more tightly aligned the four are, the calmer and more positive the internal forces are.
​
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​The more mis-aligned the elements are, the more chaotic and negative the internal forces are.
 
These internal forces are a large part of what makes up organizational culture!
 
If you want a better culture, align your organization! 
 
Today’s intention: Just think about the idea of culture reflecting alignment. If you have the opportunity, pull out some paper and just capture your thoughts. If you have found value in this week’s messages, please consider sharing one takeaway you have with me. I would love to hear from you. Reply to this email or click here.

Cheers!

Frederick
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  • Resources
    • The Assistant Principal Podcast >
      • Frederick's Featured Podcasts
    • Daily Emails
    • Free Resources
  • reclaiming purpose
  • Support and Services
    • Testimonials
    • Strategic Leader Academy >
      • Building Classroom Culture
    • Coaching
    • Speaking